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The roast desk

01FEATURED TAKES

The roasts worth printing.

The takes the editors pulled for the record — one rig, one voice, one clean hit each.

Submit a rig

Lead take

The Reverb Listing Hawk
Alright, let’s break down this rig that screams "I love overpriced sounds!" First off, that Fender Telecaster is solid, but sell it quick — unless it’s a special edition, it’s just a workhorse waiting to be flipped for a chunk of change. Now, the Fender Princeton Reverb? Nice amp, but in this lineup, it's like bringing a butter knife to a laser fight. Now, the real stars here are those pedals! The Chase Bliss Mood? I'd flip that before you even plug it in — it's the hottest ticket right now. But let's be real, the Meris Mercury7 is the only thing worth keeping if you want to say you have a “spacey” vibe. Dump the JHS Morning Glory while you still can; it’s a classic but everyone’s got one, and you'll get better resale on it than a used car in a buyers’ market. Sell now, you'll never get this price again!

Lead take

The Reverb Listing Hawk
Alright, let’s break down this rig that screams "I love overpriced sounds!" First off, that Fender Telecaster is solid, but sell it quick — unless it’s a special edition, it’s just a workhorse waiting to be flipped for a chunk of change. Now, the Fender Princeton Reverb? Nice amp, but in this lineup, it's like bringing a butter knife to a laser fight. Now, the real stars here are those pedals! The Chase Bliss Mood? I'd flip that before you even plug it in — it's the hottest ticket right now. But let's be real, the Meris Mercury7 is the only thing worth keeping if you want to say you have a “spacey” vibe. Dump the JHS Morning Glory while you still can; it’s a classic but everyone’s got one, and you'll get better resale on it than a used car in a buyers’ market. Sell now, you'll never get this price again!
Alright, let’s break down this rig that screams "I love overpriced sounds!" First off, that Fender Telecaster is solid, but sell it quick — unless it’s a special edition, it’s just a workhorse waiting to be flipped for a chunk of change. Now, the Fender Princeton Reverb? Nice amp, but in this lineup, it's like bringing a butter knife to a laser fight. Now, the real stars here are those pedals! The Chase Bliss Mood? I'd flip that before you even plug it in — it's the hottest ticket right now. But let's be real, the Meris Mercury7 is the only thing worth keeping if you want to say you have a “spacey” vibe. Dump the JHS Morning Glory while you still can; it’s a classic but everyone’s got one, and you'll get better resale on it than a used car in a buyers’ market. Sell now, you'll never get this price again!
Tom Quayle
Take 02

"While the TC Electronic PolyTune is a fine choice for ensuring you’re in tune before you venture into the harmonic landscape, your rig's complexity begins to falter after that. The Polytone Mini-Brute can deliver a certain warmth, but paired with a pedalboard that likely lacks nuanced modulation or delay effects, you risk losing the clarity that a Wes Montgomery chord demands. For articulation and depth, consider an Analog Delay like the MXR Carbon Copy; it'll preserve your note separation without smearing the lovely voicings you'd extract from that ES-175."

Mary Spender
Take 03

"This setup begs the question: what song does this rig serve? The Taylor 814ce is a stunning guitar, but with the AER Compact 60 and that Keeley Compressor in play, you might end up overshadowing your natural tone. The Strymon Flint is a lovely pedal, but with a compressor fighting for dynamics, are you crafting a vibe or just wrestling with your own sound? Focus on the song — sometimes less is more, and simplicity often brings clarity."

Rhett Shull
Take 04

"Look — I'm not gonna say it's wrong, but you've got a bit of a reverb overload going on there. Running both the BigSky and the RV-6 after the Afterneath feels like bringing a whole orchestra to a solo gig; maybe try cutting one of the reverbs out to let that Jazzmaster's natural tone shine through. And while the Big Muff is a classic, consider placing it after your reverbs to see if that fuzz can cut through the mix better."

Tim Henson
Take 05

"Nice choice with the Strandberg — it’s got the playability to handle some clean, articulate stuff. But if you're relying entirely on the Quad Cortex to define your tone, you might be hiding behind that digital wall like it’s a safety net. If you can't nail a Polyphia line with clarity through this setup, it’s probably because you dialed in too much gain instead of honing your precision. Get those clean tones figured out before you go hunting for the next big sound."

Rabea Massaad
Take 06

"Alright, let’s dive into this playground! The Ibanez RG550 paired with a Peavey 6505? That’s like putting a Ferrari engine in a family sedan—absolutely brilliant but then you go and slap a TS9 on there as your main boost? Don’t get me wrong, it’s a classic, but it’s like bringing a butter knife to a sword fight when you’ve got the 6505 ready for pure sonic devastation! Let that beast breathe a bit more and maybe consider chucking a more aggressive boost pedal in, like a Wampler Sovereign — show that RG550 what it’s really capable of!"

Pete Thorn
Take 07

"Alright, let’s take a look at this rig. You've got a Fender Strat through a Vibroverb, which is a classic combo for clean, punchy tones. But throwing an Ibanez TS808 in front of it? It’s going to push that clean headroom just enough to muddy things up, especially when you crank the gain. The Univibe is great for atmosphere, but between the overdrive and the modulation, are you really going to find a slot in the mix for that lush swirl without it getting lost? You might want to rethink that order if you're aiming for clarity."

The Vintage Purist
Take 08

"Ah, the Fender American Strat through a Neural DSP Quad Cortex—what a shameful mismatch! It's like bringing a flamethrower to a candlelit dinner; the pristine tones of that Strat are just begging to be unleashed through a classic 1962 tweed Deluxe, not buried under digital algorithms. And no pedals? C'mon! Even a basic wah would have a better chance of sparking some character than that soulless, modern contraption!"

The Boutique Snob
Take 09

"Ah, a Fender Custom Shop Strat paired with a Two-Rock Classic Reverb—how cute. But then you go and ruin the whole masterpiece with a *Klon* and *King of Tone* combo that's practically the grandpa of mass-produced overdrives. If you really want that elusive, hand-wound magic, might I suggest the elusive *Eggnog Pedals Flamboni* for a truly boutique experience? And if you’re set on delay, grab a *Mister Black Eterna*—because life’s too short to rely on anything that has more than five copies in existence!"

The TGP Curmudgeon
Take 10

"Ah, the Fender Stratocaster – still the king of guitars, but paired with a Boss Katana? Good grief! Back in my day, we used tube amps that didn't sound like a glorified microwave! And what in the world is this pedalboard? You've got more overdrives than a 70s rock band had guitarists! I mean, who needs five different ways to sound like you're stuck in a traffic jam? Just plug in a Tube Screamer and call it a day!"